“Well, hell will find you anywhere”
*SPOILERS AHEAD*
Wesley Snipes
vehicles have become a rarity, but I hadn’t realized that we’ve
reached the point where even movies advertised as such aren’t
actually so. This is the case with Armed Response,
which is more of an
ensemble effort that
doesn’t even feature Wesley as its top guy. The movie’s
advertising is all about subverting expectations like
that, as
it presents the picture as an action flick despite
being a horror movie.
Its
poor reception
makes me think that I wasn’t the only one unpleasantly surprised by
this, and while I had some
fun with it,
I need to add my general disapproval to the cacophony. Though better
produced than expected and bearing
a decent premise, it’s ultimately toothless and doesn’t take its
ideas nearly far enough.
The
story: A team of military operatives is sent to investigate radio
silence at a high-tech, AI-supported interrogation facility called
the Temple. When the Temple inexplicably traps them inside, they’re
subjected to mind-bending phenomena and mortal danger by a mysterious
entity.
The
studios involved in the production include Saban Films, WWE Films and
Erebus Pictures – Gene Simmons’ new company. I expected something
over-the-top and bombastic from this alliance, and in a way, I got
it. The story is determined to break the rules we expect for such a
horror film, with the result that a lot of its details come as a
surprise. (Even if the plot itself is predictable.) Director John
Stockwell somehow manages to keep me from falling asleep despite
filling his movie with endless scenes of characters stalking down
corridors. I was never bored while watching this…but I did get
irritated. At some point, for its own convenience, the film just
stops trying to make sense. The facility is pretty miraculous to
begin with but stretches things to head-shaking levels by physically
conjuring a ghostly figure to knock off the cast. Eventually it just
grows hands out of the walls to rip a character’s limbs off. The
movie’s selling itself as a combination of The Cube and any
number of rogue A.I. stories but then pulls Nightmare on Elm
Street-style tricks without precedent.
The
cast is okay, even though they’re not made the most of. Again,
Wesley Snipes shouldn’t have top billing – at least not ahead of
Dave Annable, who plays the real protagonist. Snipes’ presence
isn’t even essential: with only a single fight scene to justify his
casting, anybody could’ve played his role. WWE wrestler Colby Lopez
(AKA Seth Rollins) is used to greater effect, but neither of his two
fights are against Snipes. Anne Heche spends most of the movie being
a plain supporting character before suddenly ascending to main player
status. Gene Simmons is practically unrecognizable in his cameo and
doesn’t leave any impression.
My
biggest complaint is the lack of thought behind the movie’s premise
and themes. There’s no real discussion or acknowledgment of the
dark reputation that interrogation facilities have earned since the
Bush years, which is disappointing given where the plot goes. While
the story’s “twist” is that the sentient Temple is choosing to
punish the operatives for war crimes, its morality is disappointingly
mainstream. It kills the most direct perpetrators but inexplicably
gives a pass to the Heche character – choosing to ignore (1) her
complicity in the atrocities and (2) her willing participation in an
immoral war. Additionally, there’s at least one character on the
team who’s legitimately innocent (Morgan Roberts), but the Temple
does nothing to protect him from murder. I can’t help but imagine
what the movie would be like if its sense of right and wrong was more
nuanced…
Armed Response
will make for a tolerable evening
when it finds its way onto the SyFy channel, but there’s no need to
spend money on it unless you’re an absolute Wesley Snipes
completionist.
Armed Response
(2017)
Directed
by
John Stockwell (Kickboxer:
Vengeance)
Written
by
Matt Savelloni
Starring
Dave Annable (Brothers
& Sisters),
Wesley Snipes (Blade
trilogy), Anne Heche (Six
Days Seven Nights),
Colby Lopez [AKA Seth Rollins]
Cool
costars:
Most of the supporting cast
has credits
in major action flicks, but I haven’t seen enough of those to know
whether the actors are sufficiently cool; they definitely aren’t in
here. Gene Simmons would be included if he weren’t such an asshole.
Content
warning:
Extreme violence,
military brutality, violence
against women, child murder, drowning
Copyright
Temple
Picture Holdings, LLC / Lionsgate
B-Movie Dragons 